Sunday, July 12, 2009
Welcome to the Real World/Take your Best Shot
It’s been a shitty week. While my line of work doesn’t usually expect long hours, I have been doing some insane time and not feeling very appreciated.
Welcome to the real world, you say.
Just feel like general crap. And it’s not helping that my lower back feels like somebody has been whacking it with a baseball bat, or that I have cramps that make double over in pain.
Work is being shitty, I don’t if it’s the cold that’s freezing my brain but I feel like I am saying “Uh…duhhh” with a stupid look on my face every time someone tries to explain something to me and REALLY struggling, more so than normal, with the accounting side of my work. I’m not an accountant and God only knows those who are how they can decipher the jumble of numbers from different reports.
On the bright side, the photographer sent us our photos from our photoshoot a couple of weeks ago. I was surprised at how quickly he got them to us, but wasn’t about to question his timing when I was eager to see whether I could have a modelling career in the works.
And well….as crap as it is at times, I think I’ll stick to my day job.
Some of the shots were great – I couldn’t believe that it was me. But I hated them at the same time. I know I was probably being too hard on myself, but I couldn’t see past my flabby arms, the hint of a double chin and my fucking ‘curvaceous’ figure. Get over it, I am told. And I try. Oh, Lord how I try. I think I am meant to live forever with the insecurity of body image.
Evs got pissed off at me and told me that if I was so bloody worried about my figure then I shouldn’t have done it in the first place. And that next time just put a bag over my head. I kinda felt stupid after that, but one thought kept niggling at me…
Really, if I was serious I’d need a bag for my whole body: P.
The whole experience was really eye-opening. I have a grudging sort of respect for models now…well…ok I always did, knowing how hard it is to be fierce all the time, but really…modelling is hard work. You have to be so aware of everything – the garment, the positioning of your every limb, the artistic creation of the photographer and of course, your face.
We had to be all pouty and snarly, ok really, just not smile to give that feeling of editorial edginess. I think I managed to pull more of a blank look in the moments that I was trying hard not to pull a muscle when trying not to laugh as Sam and Evs made funny faces. Sometimes it worked.
The photographer was slightly obsessed with the concept of a lightbox and experimenting with shades of light and dark and we spent a good hour or so shivering in the cold studio (which was realistically a dump and home to many other artistic endeavours judging by the doof-doof noises and the screech of the electrical guitar from upstairs). Finally after playing around all the different flashes and lights and set up we got to it. I was given the most awkward position and I was wishing as I held the pose that I had pumped weights the day before because I struggled. He got some nice shots though and some that I could even possibly think about getting printed.
After a while it was evident that daylight was long gone and the light inside the studio wasn’t any better, so we called it a day. Sam was annoyed because he missed out on some solo shots at the end and sulked all the way home which just caused us to tease him even more.
Ok, so here are a few of the ones that I liked despite my self-loathing. Tell me what you think – reckon I can put Tyra out of business?? :P (Ok guys, kidding. Nobody messes with the Queen of Fierce!)
Current music: Fashion - Mar java
Labels: booya, bring it on, dead feet, fashionista, fat day, me me me, over it already, photos
posted at
Monday, July 06, 2009
How Silvara got her groove back
It seems like all around me there is greyness. Like the fog that blankets the city in the mornings, my mind and life seem to be engulfed in ways that I don’t seem to know how to break free from.
Life is as per normal. Work, in particular has been extra-busy that the mornings and evenings have all rolled into one stretch of darkness. Daylight seems far away and even the brief glimpses only reveal rain and wind.
It must be winter. The heaviness I feel must be due to the season.
For some reason, I’m feeling it a lot more this year. Black, always a favourite colour of mine is my staple attire. It looks like the city has the same idea and from my high rise office window, I see them bustle and scatter like ants.
I feel morose and gloomy which has not been good in the way of writing, because everything that comes to mind is depressing.
So what HAS happened since I last blogged?
My week-long experiment was interesting, albeit it coming to a very ant-climatic end.
We managed to pull it off until about…last Friday night (i.e. last Friday in June). There I went out and in way that I haven’t done since my uni days, came home thoroughly drunk. Let’s just say vomiting was involved and meant that Evs was not happy cleaning up after me. However, from what I can remember, despite my stench and incoherent rambling about having one shot too many, he lovingly carried me upstairs, ran the shower, washed my vomit-streaked hair and put me to bed. So no sex that night, or the night after. My head was still pounding.
All in all – over the week we rediscovered each other. I think, actually, I KNOW I probably overreact to the whole situation, but it was still important to me to make the point known to Evs about how I was feeling. We realised that it’s ok to want to sleep, and that cuddling is just as intimate as making love. We realised that despite life, we need to make time for each other and to really talk. I think, most importantly was that I was reassured of Evs’ love for me, his desire. And that was all I ever needed.
Relationships are hard.
And exhausting.
It’s quite amazing to think about all the relationships that we have in our life and how much work we actually need to put into them to keep them going. Whether as a sister, daughter, wife, colleague or friend – it’s bloody tiring.
It’s like trying to juggle all these balls and keep them from dropping. One or two of them may get dangerously close to dropping but then you just have to be quick enough to make sure you get there before it hits the floor.
I don’t think I’m doing a very good job at juggling. Unco at the best of times, seriously my hand-eye coordination needs some serious looking at. I haven’t spoken to my best friend since our Grampians trip in late April. Granted she has been overseas in that time and is most probably holed away studying for her upcoming (or has it happened?? Jesus, I don’t even KNOW) GMAT exam in her impulsive ambition to get into b-school, but I have no clue what has been happening in her life. I need to see her and fast.
I also don’t think I see my parents often enough. And this is truly embarrassing. They live, literally, two minutes away from me. While I see Mani and little bro at least once a week, I haven’t actually spent any substantial time at my home. And I feel so, so bad. My weekends (while I am not puking or nursing a hangover the size of Australia) have been so packed with events and socialising that I have let my family take the backburner. I need to spend some time at home and fast.
Work is another story.
More and more each day, I realise that the corporate world is a big game. And in it, it’s all about who you know and how well. While I have realised that this is a fact of working life, I have never seen it so blatantly ingrained until now.
And I need to step up.
This observation might actually require a post of its own so I think I’ll leave the rambling. But it’s got me thinking quite hard.
Part of that thinking has led me to believe that attractiveness plays a big part in this networking business. And while I believe I fall somewhere in between Megan Fox and Cave Woman (as with most of the female population), those deemed ‘better looking’ are, to my surprising non-surprise, are given more priority. Even in simple conversation.
And so, in a (misguided?) attempt to try and play the game, I am focusing a lot harder on losing weight. It’s at a standstill, and with this dreary weather, the motivation to head to the gym (due to the crazy hours I have been working) has plummeted.
But – the motivation to do well at work, even if it means having to play the game, means that a lot more rides on the dropping of the poundage. That means that the chocolate brownies need to go. Fuck.
I feel better now actually. My writing mojo has been dented as of late. Bottling up thoughts is not a good way to spend the winter. I think I’ve got my groove back.
Current music: Michael Jackson - Beat It
Life is as per normal. Work, in particular has been extra-busy that the mornings and evenings have all rolled into one stretch of darkness. Daylight seems far away and even the brief glimpses only reveal rain and wind.
It must be winter. The heaviness I feel must be due to the season.
For some reason, I’m feeling it a lot more this year. Black, always a favourite colour of mine is my staple attire. It looks like the city has the same idea and from my high rise office window, I see them bustle and scatter like ants.
I feel morose and gloomy which has not been good in the way of writing, because everything that comes to mind is depressing.
So what HAS happened since I last blogged?
My week-long experiment was interesting, albeit it coming to a very ant-climatic end.
We managed to pull it off until about…last Friday night (i.e. last Friday in June). There I went out and in way that I haven’t done since my uni days, came home thoroughly drunk. Let’s just say vomiting was involved and meant that Evs was not happy cleaning up after me. However, from what I can remember, despite my stench and incoherent rambling about having one shot too many, he lovingly carried me upstairs, ran the shower, washed my vomit-streaked hair and put me to bed. So no sex that night, or the night after. My head was still pounding.
All in all – over the week we rediscovered each other. I think, actually, I KNOW I probably overreact to the whole situation, but it was still important to me to make the point known to Evs about how I was feeling. We realised that it’s ok to want to sleep, and that cuddling is just as intimate as making love. We realised that despite life, we need to make time for each other and to really talk. I think, most importantly was that I was reassured of Evs’ love for me, his desire. And that was all I ever needed.
Relationships are hard.
And exhausting.
It’s quite amazing to think about all the relationships that we have in our life and how much work we actually need to put into them to keep them going. Whether as a sister, daughter, wife, colleague or friend – it’s bloody tiring.
It’s like trying to juggle all these balls and keep them from dropping. One or two of them may get dangerously close to dropping but then you just have to be quick enough to make sure you get there before it hits the floor.
I don’t think I’m doing a very good job at juggling. Unco at the best of times, seriously my hand-eye coordination needs some serious looking at. I haven’t spoken to my best friend since our Grampians trip in late April. Granted she has been overseas in that time and is most probably holed away studying for her upcoming (or has it happened?? Jesus, I don’t even KNOW) GMAT exam in her impulsive ambition to get into b-school, but I have no clue what has been happening in her life. I need to see her and fast.
I also don’t think I see my parents often enough. And this is truly embarrassing. They live, literally, two minutes away from me. While I see Mani and little bro at least once a week, I haven’t actually spent any substantial time at my home. And I feel so, so bad. My weekends (while I am not puking or nursing a hangover the size of Australia) have been so packed with events and socialising that I have let my family take the backburner. I need to spend some time at home and fast.
Work is another story.
More and more each day, I realise that the corporate world is a big game. And in it, it’s all about who you know and how well. While I have realised that this is a fact of working life, I have never seen it so blatantly ingrained until now.
And I need to step up.
This observation might actually require a post of its own so I think I’ll leave the rambling. But it’s got me thinking quite hard.
Part of that thinking has led me to believe that attractiveness plays a big part in this networking business. And while I believe I fall somewhere in between Megan Fox and Cave Woman (as with most of the female population), those deemed ‘better looking’ are, to my surprising non-surprise, are given more priority. Even in simple conversation.
And so, in a (misguided?) attempt to try and play the game, I am focusing a lot harder on losing weight. It’s at a standstill, and with this dreary weather, the motivation to head to the gym (due to the crazy hours I have been working) has plummeted.
But – the motivation to do well at work, even if it means having to play the game, means that a lot more rides on the dropping of the poundage. That means that the chocolate brownies need to go. Fuck.
I feel better now actually. My writing mojo has been dented as of late. Bottling up thoughts is not a good way to spend the winter. I think I’ve got my groove back.
Current music: Michael Jackson - Beat It
Labels: as the wise lady said, bad girl, family gatherings, fear, friends, ohhh my head, over it already, reality bites, so stupid, the Firm, weight loss
posted at
Friday, June 26, 2009
He moonwalked out our lives forever
Woke up this morning to Farah Fawcett's death.
Moments later - the news cut out to reports of Michael Jackson having a heart attack and then more shockingly - his death.
I was in complete denial.
Still am.
Don't care what the news says - it's unbelievable.
Sigh.
RIP MJ.
Current music: Billy Jean - Michael Jackson
Moments later - the news cut out to reports of Michael Jackson having a heart attack and then more shockingly - his death.
I was in complete denial.
Still am.
Don't care what the news says - it's unbelievable.
Sigh.
RIP MJ.
Current music: Billy Jean - Michael Jackson
Labels: crazy things, so stupid, the news, unbreak my heart, unfair
posted at
Monday, June 22, 2009
Indecent proposal??
A few months ago, I was in my car listening to the morning breakfast show. I was only paying half-attention to the chatter as I tried to maneuver my way into a lane that wasn’t crawling at snail’s pace. The presenters were talking long-distance to a woman who decided, for her husband’s 40th birthday as a gift – sex – everyday for a year. Yup – you heard me. A WHOLE YEAR.They were speaking to her to get an idea to see what possessed her to conceive (haha…errr..pun not intended??) such a thought and what his reaction was to it. And surprisingly – he refused the gift. Her reasoning had been that over the years, they had grown apart in intimacy and it was as much as a gift to herself as well as him. (Read more about her story here).
I remember listening to the interview with a sort of half-are-you-serious, half-envious kind of feeling. Envious, because at that time I believed that I had already hit the ultimate nightmare of being married. The nightmare in which things were meant to spiral downhill when kids, mortgages and jobs come along….far, far into the future. A parody of a nightmare that I was living silently after just one year of marriage.
The Sex Only Gets Worse nightmare. Also known as the I Don’t Feel Like It Tonight disease and the Why Don’t We Do THAT Anymore syndrome.
Believe me it is an issue that I have blogged about time and again, and it is the only thing in my marriage that has the power to make me feel depressed. I KNOW what the problem is – what I was finding hard to accept was the fact that we even had a problem in the first place. These things don’t happen to us. Seriously. We were probably THE horniest teenagers you could find. Public Displays of Affection?? Pfft – we broke every rule. Discreetly of course :P.
Anyways, things are a lot better but probably not at the point where I can say that it’s fantastic. And that’s the scary part isn’t it? Admitting it. Everyone thinks that everyone else is getting more than they are and not many people actually admit to HOW much. My reasoning has been for not letting it totally get to me is that I LOVE Evs, and really sex while a huge part of our relationship – ISN’T the whole thing. Because if it was then there was no way I was marrying him. I am now more content to snuggle up with him on the couch watching dvd’s than swing from the rafters. Whether that’s us getting older, our relationship maturing or just the natural course of marriage – I don’t know.
But, and this is the part that started all of this, I am a person who expresses her love through physical affection. Hugs and kisses – if I love you then I want to get under your skin. Make you feel the same intensity that I feel for you. Creepy huh?? :P
Anyways.
Back to the point.
I believe that Evs heard that same radio show that same morning. Because he put to me last night a very interesting proposal. Just before getting into some heavy swinging he said – ‘Babe – I love you.’
That set some sort of dim alarm bell off in my head but I was too distracted by the things he was doing under the covers that I could only really murmur a “Hmmm?”.
“And I was thinking…I promise that we will make love every day for a whole week”.
That sentence stopped me in my tracks and I disentangled myself to look him square in the face. The mere fact that such a statement would get me to stop was testament to how long had it been since I heard, or even thought about hearing those words. Before – it was never said. It was just…err…done. Wow, I thought, where is this coming from?
“But”, he continued. “I want you to wear something different each time”.
A few emotions flit through me when he said that. Annoyance (What? I’m not good enough for you the way I am??!!), stubbornness (I don’t care if I ever get sex again! I’m not falling for this!!) and then grudging agreement (I GUESS looking at trackies and sweatpants every day isn’t very sexy).
Now let me explain to why I agreed. Men, I have heard, are visual creatures. That’s why porn exists. Women on the other hand, need mental arousing before anything is going to happen. That’s the reason for fake orgasms.
I spent most of the time that I was feeling like this thinking that it was all Evs fault. So what if I had gained some weight and didn’t feel like making an effort – HE should always want to be up for it. I think I was too deep in my wallowing of self-pity that I didn’t realize that Evs didn’t care. I mean, he didn’t CARE about my weight gain or any of the other millions of reasons that I found to destroy my self-esteem every night. He still loved me for me. He was still attracted to me.
But what he was most attracted to was the confidence I had when I didn’t care about the way I looked. When I made love with abandon. He wanted those memories back and what I hadn’t realized was that they were my memories too.
So, starting from tonight, we will embark on our own journey. It’s not as dramatic as a whole year of sex, but what we get out of it will last much, much longer than a week.
The only problem I have left is….what the hell am I going to wear???!!!
Current music: Lady GaGa - Love Game
Labels: as the wise lady said, bad girl, cross the line dammit, fear, finally as one, honeymoon, lazy loving, reality bites, unbreak my heart, what's love
posted at
Friday, June 12, 2009
Who's that 'round the corner?
Sitting at home after a long, long week. Apologies for being MIA. I like to pull out my alter ego at such situations – the one who skulks in the shadows and watches the world go by in the darkness. I call her The Lurker.
Which means, the past shenanigans haven’t escaped my notice but I feel I wisely stayed out of it by accentuating my Lurker personality and surveying the battlefield from afar. I WAS thinking about updating Twitter with every comment that was posted but I got bored after the first 200 or so :P. Glad it’s over…or IS it???? Muahahahaha. Ok moving on….
I have been, in truth, super busy. Juggling two reviews at work at the same time because everyone conveniently decided to take leave. I mean, come ON. It’s WINTER. What are you going to do when it’s cold, wet and miserable??? Oh…two tickets to the Gold Coast huh? Fine, rub it in.
I find myself creeping closer and closer to Evs during the night that by morning I wake up to find myself entangled with him with limbs and blankets everywhere. I snuggle so close that I end up pushing him off his pillow and he gets pissed off from his head being so close to the edge that he snatches the pillow and whacks the offender (me) with it. I quickly go back to ‘my’ side, shocked into waking up. That’s love.
Am slightly bored now that all my fave shows have finished for the season. However am not too down because the US - So You Think You Can Dance has started for its fifth season. I HEART SYTYCD!!!
Last night’s show (for me – it’s uhh...available one day after it airs in the US. Although they have just premiered it in Aus tonight. But who can wait??!) had AMAZING performances. I was a bit apprehensive when they announced the Bollywood routine and my resignation was confirmed when the strains of ‘Jai Ho’ started. Thankfully, they played the Indian version and the dance itself wasn’t too bad.
Oh!! And yes – I almost forgot! Well it HAS been about 2 weeks now since my famed dinner party (I can’t believe you guys didn’t forget!!!) but I wanted to share what happened on That Night.
Well (deep breath).
It went….FANTASTIC!!!
I went over to my parents place a few nights before to gain the infinite wisdom of my mother. Nothing is better than your Mum’s cooking right?? That was my thinking as I grabbed a few quick recipes.
So the final menu (thank you again for all your suggestions!!):
I bought a food processor the week before, tired of having to slave away over chopping onions and crying from the sheer effort and I gotta say, total value for money. Used it for everything. Although the carrots kinda stained it…but meh…it’ll come out. Eventually.
Everybody loved the food, which was a huge relief for me. I ATTEMPTED to make this Veggie and Lentil squares for entrées but then realised I didn’t have a baking tray to actually MAKE them so I kinda…had…to abandon…it. With 15 minutes to go before guests arrived.
And which is the point where I TOTALLY understood my mother when she insisted we buy a house that had a formal lounge room in it (so that guests wouldn’t see the MESS in the kitchen). Too bad our ‘formal lounge’ currently has no lounge of any sort in it and houses a pool table. So the guests wandered down the hallway to the family room which adjoins the kitchen. Their eyes kinda widened at the array of pots and pans and the potatoey-lentily mess that was my abandoned entrée.
After dinner the real party started with the wine flowing all night (which had already started from the moment people walked in lol. Yup. It was THAT kind of party :P) and even a few rounds of shots done in various glasses with some Russian vodka and something that smelt suspiciously like plums.
We played poker and pool until about 2am and then with the last of the guests gone and the house in complete disarray, Evs and I went to bed.
And now it’s time for me to go to bed.
Oooh…! A documentary called ‘The perfect vagina’ is on TV. I’m watching that. Evs is visibly embarrassed heheheh.
Current music: Gossip - Heavy Cross
Which means, the past shenanigans haven’t escaped my notice but I feel I wisely stayed out of it by accentuating my Lurker personality and surveying the battlefield from afar. I WAS thinking about updating Twitter with every comment that was posted but I got bored after the first 200 or so :P. Glad it’s over…or IS it???? Muahahahaha. Ok moving on….
I have been, in truth, super busy. Juggling two reviews at work at the same time because everyone conveniently decided to take leave. I mean, come ON. It’s WINTER. What are you going to do when it’s cold, wet and miserable??? Oh…two tickets to the Gold Coast huh? Fine, rub it in.
I find myself creeping closer and closer to Evs during the night that by morning I wake up to find myself entangled with him with limbs and blankets everywhere. I snuggle so close that I end up pushing him off his pillow and he gets pissed off from his head being so close to the edge that he snatches the pillow and whacks the offender (me) with it. I quickly go back to ‘my’ side, shocked into waking up. That’s love.
Am slightly bored now that all my fave shows have finished for the season. However am not too down because the US - So You Think You Can Dance has started for its fifth season. I HEART SYTYCD!!!
Last night’s show (for me – it’s uhh...available one day after it airs in the US. Although they have just premiered it in Aus tonight. But who can wait??!) had AMAZING performances. I was a bit apprehensive when they announced the Bollywood routine and my resignation was confirmed when the strains of ‘Jai Ho’ started. Thankfully, they played the Indian version and the dance itself wasn’t too bad.
Oh!! And yes – I almost forgot! Well it HAS been about 2 weeks now since my famed dinner party (I can’t believe you guys didn’t forget!!!) but I wanted to share what happened on That Night.
Well (deep breath).
It went….FANTASTIC!!!
I went over to my parents place a few nights before to gain the infinite wisdom of my mother. Nothing is better than your Mum’s cooking right?? That was my thinking as I grabbed a few quick recipes.
So the final menu (thank you again for all your suggestions!!):
- Chicken curry
- Chole
- Shahi Paneer
- Aloo Palak subzi
- Raita
- Jeera Rice
- Salad
- Toasted Pita Bread
I bought a food processor the week before, tired of having to slave away over chopping onions and crying from the sheer effort and I gotta say, total value for money. Used it for everything. Although the carrots kinda stained it…but meh…it’ll come out. Eventually.
Everybody loved the food, which was a huge relief for me. I ATTEMPTED to make this Veggie and Lentil squares for entrées but then realised I didn’t have a baking tray to actually MAKE them so I kinda…had…to abandon…it. With 15 minutes to go before guests arrived.
And which is the point where I TOTALLY understood my mother when she insisted we buy a house that had a formal lounge room in it (so that guests wouldn’t see the MESS in the kitchen). Too bad our ‘formal lounge’ currently has no lounge of any sort in it and houses a pool table. So the guests wandered down the hallway to the family room which adjoins the kitchen. Their eyes kinda widened at the array of pots and pans and the potatoey-lentily mess that was my abandoned entrée.
After dinner the real party started with the wine flowing all night (which had already started from the moment people walked in lol. Yup. It was THAT kind of party :P) and even a few rounds of shots done in various glasses with some Russian vodka and something that smelt suspiciously like plums.
We played poker and pool until about 2am and then with the last of the guests gone and the house in complete disarray, Evs and I went to bed.
And now it’s time for me to go to bed.
Oooh…! A documentary called ‘The perfect vagina’ is on TV. I’m watching that. Evs is visibly embarrassed heheheh.
Current music: Gossip - Heavy Cross
Labels: friends, no more food, ohhh my head, party starter
posted at
Wednesday, June 03, 2009
Too many freaks, not enough circuses.
I saw this slogan on the t-shirt of the barista who made my coffee this morning. After having the required chuckle (don’t witty t-shirt slogans do it for you too?? My fave to date – “I’M what Willis was talking about” :P), it actually got me thinking that it was the perfect line to sum up the current media hype.
A few days ago, a congregation of Indian international students protested in front of Flinders St Station in Melbourne against the rising, possibly racially-motivated attacks on them. Just before peak hour hit, the police came by and told them to clear off. As it would be some resisted and with all protests, words were exchanged and it seems it came to fisticuffs.
Since then, effigies have been burned of our PM in India by the BJP (which in my opinion is a matter of no consequence. Effigies, it seems, are the most popular way to get attention. After losing the election I think the BJP is just acting like any opportunistic politician and trying to stay ‘relevant’.) and protests held over ‘Racist Australia’.
Forums and Facebook alike have been flooded with comments of the nature – “What Australia racist? You bloody idiot” and “Go home if you think Australia is racist” and others of the same sentiment.
A well knowtool tosser acquaintance from uni (who by the way is Indian himself if that makes a difference) made a statement of FB that all Indian students who think Australia is racist should go home ‘in their rusty’ boats. And posted a link about Indian students tending to stick together in foreign countries.
Well duh.
If I was going to a country, say Africa or China where I had no idea of the culture or even the USA/UK where at least the native language is English – I know that I and most people would tend to gravitate towards people of the same culture/country until they were comfortable enough. People seek the familiar to feel safer in an unknown situation. Whether that be finding a bunch of Aussies down at the local pub or going to the local Indian restaurant to feel like getting something close enough to ‘Mum’s cooking’ – it’s human nature.
It takes more than one generation to "assimilate" with society, as with the Italians, Greeks, Vietnamese and Chinese before - the first generation coming over still thought fondly of home but their kids (us/our parents) view the country differently. It takes time.
As for the attacks.
Well – I believe the media here and in India have hyped up the situation well beyond necessary. Melbourne has a growing problem of escalating street violence. That cannot be denied. However, it happens that a lot of the attacks have happened on Indian students – mainly as a mugging gone wrong. The Indian student community, with fair reason is feeling scared and feels like the police besides telling them to “not talk in their native language too loudly, not display prominent signs of wealth like ipods and mobiles and not take the train late at night” are doing nothing.
Most of that advice is common sense– it’s debatable whether not talking in your native language would dissuade an attacker but I can see how the police may feel that foreign languages may reveal that they are not natives are thus weaker and easier to pick on and rob. But the gist of it is right – having lived in Australia all my life, I’d take that on board. Just like I’d take any precaution to increase my safety.
India is up in arms about the ‘so-called’ police brutality which to be frank, was not there – the eye-witness accounts are from union leaders from universities with a high number of these Indian students may or may not have a political agenda when talking to the media. The police allowed them to protest peacefully until around 5am when the area would be soon congested with the city peak hour traffic. Certain protestors were detained after creating a spectacle (e.g. biting the hand of a policeman) and then released without charge.
It is still unfounded whether these attacks were racially motivated. And I am not just defending my country here – I know better than most that Australia is no stranger to racism, no matter how they do protest. I’ve experienced it growing up, where kids would try and see if the ‘mud’ could come off my skin and call me ‘curry-muncher’. However, asides from the odd jackass, since childhood I haven’t. And I feel that is pretty much sums up, in my experience what Australia is like. It doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen to other people. It doesn’t mean that Australia is racism-free. It just means that I personally haven’t felt it.
Australia is generally no more racist than any other country. To those people who say that India is worse – perhaps so – but how is that relevant. That is your experience. It’s not a question of ‘your country is more racist than mine’. It happens. Everywhere. But in Australia where we publicly embrace multiculturalism - it's a disappointment. There are no us vs. them.
The question behind the protesting is - why are specifically Indian students being attacked? Is there a racist motive? If there is, then we should be doing something about it not telling them to go home. That's like blaming a rape victim for what she was wearing. If it’s not, then we need to all calm down and think about the real problem – street violence.
Related articles:
http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/are-we-racist-golly-gosh-goodness-gracious-me-yes/
http://www.theaustralian.news.com.au/story/0,,25579745-2702,00.html
http://www.news.com.au/story/0,,25564486-1702,00.html
Forgive me; I used up all my ranting replying to his inane posts on FB.
Current music: Britney Spears - Circus
A few days ago, a congregation of Indian international students protested in front of Flinders St Station in Melbourne against the rising, possibly racially-motivated attacks on them. Just before peak hour hit, the police came by and told them to clear off. As it would be some resisted and with all protests, words were exchanged and it seems it came to fisticuffs.
Since then, effigies have been burned of our PM in India by the BJP (which in my opinion is a matter of no consequence. Effigies, it seems, are the most popular way to get attention. After losing the election I think the BJP is just acting like any opportunistic politician and trying to stay ‘relevant’.) and protests held over ‘Racist Australia’.
Forums and Facebook alike have been flooded with comments of the nature – “What Australia racist? You bloody idiot” and “Go home if you think Australia is racist” and others of the same sentiment.
A well know
Well duh.
If I was going to a country, say Africa or China where I had no idea of the culture or even the USA/UK where at least the native language is English – I know that I and most people would tend to gravitate towards people of the same culture/country until they were comfortable enough. People seek the familiar to feel safer in an unknown situation. Whether that be finding a bunch of Aussies down at the local pub or going to the local Indian restaurant to feel like getting something close enough to ‘Mum’s cooking’ – it’s human nature.
It takes more than one generation to "assimilate" with society, as with the Italians, Greeks, Vietnamese and Chinese before - the first generation coming over still thought fondly of home but their kids (us/our parents) view the country differently. It takes time.
As for the attacks.
Well – I believe the media here and in India have hyped up the situation well beyond necessary. Melbourne has a growing problem of escalating street violence. That cannot be denied. However, it happens that a lot of the attacks have happened on Indian students – mainly as a mugging gone wrong. The Indian student community, with fair reason is feeling scared and feels like the police besides telling them to “not talk in their native language too loudly, not display prominent signs of wealth like ipods and mobiles and not take the train late at night” are doing nothing.
Most of that advice is common sense– it’s debatable whether not talking in your native language would dissuade an attacker but I can see how the police may feel that foreign languages may reveal that they are not natives are thus weaker and easier to pick on and rob. But the gist of it is right – having lived in Australia all my life, I’d take that on board. Just like I’d take any precaution to increase my safety.
That so many Indian students are bashed and robbed can be largely explained by the kind of part-time jobs they tend to take, being hard workers - the late shifts in 7/11 stores, taxis and petrol stations, for instance. Imagine how safe these students are when they then go home alone late at night, often walking or taking near-deserted trains back to the tough suburbs where the cheap rents are. How safe would your own children be?(AdelaideNow)
India is up in arms about the ‘so-called’ police brutality which to be frank, was not there – the eye-witness accounts are from union leaders from universities with a high number of these Indian students may or may not have a political agenda when talking to the media. The police allowed them to protest peacefully until around 5am when the area would be soon congested with the city peak hour traffic. Certain protestors were detained after creating a spectacle (e.g. biting the hand of a policeman) and then released without charge.
It is still unfounded whether these attacks were racially motivated. And I am not just defending my country here – I know better than most that Australia is no stranger to racism, no matter how they do protest. I’ve experienced it growing up, where kids would try and see if the ‘mud’ could come off my skin and call me ‘curry-muncher’. However, asides from the odd jackass, since childhood I haven’t. And I feel that is pretty much sums up, in my experience what Australia is like. It doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen to other people. It doesn’t mean that Australia is racism-free. It just means that I personally haven’t felt it.
Australia is generally no more racist than any other country. To those people who say that India is worse – perhaps so – but how is that relevant. That is your experience. It’s not a question of ‘your country is more racist than mine’. It happens. Everywhere. But in Australia where we publicly embrace multiculturalism - it's a disappointment. There are no us vs. them.
The question behind the protesting is - why are specifically Indian students being attacked? Is there a racist motive? If there is, then we should be doing something about it not telling them to go home. That's like blaming a rape victim for what she was wearing. If it’s not, then we need to all calm down and think about the real problem – street violence.
Related articles:
http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/are-we-racist-golly-gosh-goodness-gracious-me-yes/
http://www.theaustralian.news.com.au/story/0,,25579745-2702,00.html
http://www.news.com.au/story/0,,25564486-1702,00.html
Forgive me; I used up all my ranting replying to his inane posts on FB.
Current music: Britney Spears - Circus
Labels: culture, fear, india, over it already, so stupid, the news, unfair
posted at
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
The Last Supper?
Since getting married, there has been little reason for me to go into the kitchen. I have on a fair few occasions, surprising even myself when I got the urge to flex my culinary muscles and churning out a few dishes that by fluke have turned out quite well.
I have even attempted to cook for people, hosting my very first dinner party back in January and nearly having a heart attack over trying to cook for a gathering of close friends.
I did well with my menu, despite ALWAYS struggling to know what dish compliments another and finally deciding on a mish-mash of North and South Indian style food with a bit of my Mum’s cooking thrown in as well.
People liked the food, even took seconds while I smiled worriedly and prayed that I had cooked the chicken through and not burnt the daal (Yes I served daal. I read somewhere that you never serve daal at a dinner party. Screw that.)
Now, I don’t know how it snuck up on me but it has.
We finally decided to have a housewarming party. Well…poker night with the housewarming bit added on for extra effect. We have been in our house for about 6 months now and still have a half-furnished house. We haven’t noticed it so much as we have everything we need to live by, but when people do come around we notice that things like, oh, a COFFEE TABLE, is nowhere to be found. And that our fridge cannot hold much more than our weekly quota of fruits and veggies.
It’s only Evs' uni mates coming over with their respective partners. That sounds ok doesn’t it? It’ll be approximately 15 people at the most.
We decided to sorta stagger the housewarming to break it down and make life a little bit easier for us. Plus we wouldn’t have to babysit the different friend circles. Which really wasn’t too much of an issue as they all seemed to get along at our wedding. Hmmm…but that COULD have been the rosy after-effects of too much alcohol and bhangra beats bringing them together.
Note to self: Stock up on the liquor and create a new playlist.
I’m still freaking out.
Due to our rather hectic lifestyle that doesn’t see me home some nights close to 9pm and Evs coming home late other nights, slaving over the stove has taken a back seat. Plus with my new healthy eating habits that I haveforced introduced to Evs, we eat lots of salads. And food that is easy to cook. Like salads. I make awesome salads.
I might make a chicken curry here and there, or some chickpea curry when I’m in the mood, but anything that requires thinking and tasting and waiting has been out of the picture for a while. Evs makes Lankan food in which he hasn’t quite gotten the point that I cannot handle as much chilli as him and so I eat my food with a pitcher of water near me.
So, I have less than a week to think of what to cook and actually cook for 15 people.
This is what I am planning so far:
- Chicken curry (haven’t decided what kind yet)
- Chole (I am a master at this)
- Palak Paneer (never made it before – possibly will try Mum’s recipe)
- Daal??
That’s where I am stuck.
I need at least 2-3 more dishes. I remember my mother cooking for dinner parties and having enough food to last a few great wars or famines. I don’t want to let her down. My nightmare is (besides killing everyone with my cooking) is not having enough food. It’s the Indian in me I know (I may even be forced to resort to stuffing samosas down people’s throat :P) but I really want this to go well.
PLEASE….any ideas would be great. Some good vegetarian dishes are a bit of a priority. Starters are a good idea too. Actually anything on your mind with links to simple recipes will be a godsend.
And I promise that next time anyone of you is in Melbourne, you can come to dinner.
Current music: Lady Sovereign - So Human
I have even attempted to cook for people, hosting my very first dinner party back in January and nearly having a heart attack over trying to cook for a gathering of close friends.
I did well with my menu, despite ALWAYS struggling to know what dish compliments another and finally deciding on a mish-mash of North and South Indian style food with a bit of my Mum’s cooking thrown in as well.
People liked the food, even took seconds while I smiled worriedly and prayed that I had cooked the chicken through and not burnt the daal (Yes I served daal. I read somewhere that you never serve daal at a dinner party. Screw that.)
Now, I don’t know how it snuck up on me but it has.
We finally decided to have a housewarming party. Well…poker night with the housewarming bit added on for extra effect. We have been in our house for about 6 months now and still have a half-furnished house. We haven’t noticed it so much as we have everything we need to live by, but when people do come around we notice that things like, oh, a COFFEE TABLE, is nowhere to be found. And that our fridge cannot hold much more than our weekly quota of fruits and veggies.
It’s only Evs' uni mates coming over with their respective partners. That sounds ok doesn’t it? It’ll be approximately 15 people at the most.
We decided to sorta stagger the housewarming to break it down and make life a little bit easier for us. Plus we wouldn’t have to babysit the different friend circles. Which really wasn’t too much of an issue as they all seemed to get along at our wedding. Hmmm…but that COULD have been the rosy after-effects of too much alcohol and bhangra beats bringing them together.
Note to self: Stock up on the liquor and create a new playlist.
I’m still freaking out.
Due to our rather hectic lifestyle that doesn’t see me home some nights close to 9pm and Evs coming home late other nights, slaving over the stove has taken a back seat. Plus with my new healthy eating habits that I have
I might make a chicken curry here and there, or some chickpea curry when I’m in the mood, but anything that requires thinking and tasting and waiting has been out of the picture for a while. Evs makes Lankan food in which he hasn’t quite gotten the point that I cannot handle as much chilli as him and so I eat my food with a pitcher of water near me.
So, I have less than a week to think of what to cook and actually cook for 15 people.
This is what I am planning so far:
- Chicken curry (haven’t decided what kind yet)
- Chole (I am a master at this)
- Palak Paneer (never made it before – possibly will try Mum’s recipe)
- Daal??
That’s where I am stuck.
I need at least 2-3 more dishes. I remember my mother cooking for dinner parties and having enough food to last a few great wars or famines. I don’t want to let her down. My nightmare is (besides killing everyone with my cooking) is not having enough food. It’s the Indian in me I know (I may even be forced to resort to stuffing samosas down people’s throat :P) but I really want this to go well.
PLEASE….any ideas would be great. Some good vegetarian dishes are a bit of a priority. Starters are a good idea too. Actually anything on your mind with links to simple recipes will be a godsend.
And I promise that next time anyone of you is in Melbourne, you can come to dinner.
Current music: Lady Sovereign - So Human
Labels: bring it on, cooking, crazy things, culture, friends, no more food, so stupid, the list
posted at
